Maybe we'll make something

Me myself, I've got nothing to prove

Hey punks. I really debated whether or not to abandon this newsletter. For a variety of reasons. But I have some stuff to say, as me, not a character in a novel or story, and this is kind of the only place I have for that.

Late last fall, I was having a lengthy conversation with The Spousal Unit about filmmaking. And it occurred to me that it’s a subject I find really interesting. So on a whim, I looked up the local community college to see if they had any programs about the subject. Lo and behold, they had an Associates degree in Film & Animation.

I looked up a bunch of things: the deadline to apply for spring semester, the out-of-pocket cost of one or two classes, and it seemed … possible?

So I just kept taking the next step, waiting for someone or something to stop me.

Nothing did. My (ancient) transcripts arrived quickly, and most of the gen ed courses from my abandoned attempt at a writing degree transferred.

Anyway, long story short, I’m a sophomore. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Once a week, I drive across town and sit in a classroom with a bunch of rowdy 19 year old kids learning about screenwriting. It’s a little surreal. My daughter was supposed to be in college, and instead she just started her first “big girl job.” Meanwhile, I’m the one lugging a backpack onto campus and filling up a punch card with dining hall coffee.

There’s a version of me who got frozen in amber at 25 when I had my oldest child in 1997. A woman who was unquestionably the main character in her own life, without having to fight for the position. That person has been speaking up a lot these past few months. It feels like picking up a video game after a really long break, only to discover someone leveled up your character while you were away.

I have always felt a little embarrassed about not having a degree. Looking back, I would have needed support I simply did not get to graduate. And if I couldn’t manage it as a twentysomething from a blue collar family, with undiagnosed ADHD and a full scholarship, I definitely couldn’t do it as a mom of two kids (with undiagnosed ADHD), while juggling a series of full-time jobs, and about a thousand more responsibilities.

Still not sure where this road is going to lead. Probably not to a second (third?) career as an indie filmmaker or television screenwriter, but what the hell? Six months ago I didn’t know I was going back to school. Six years ago I didn’t know I was going to move to Arizona. Anything really is possible. Maybe I have stories still worth telling. And maybe, should I get an opportunity to step onto some big stage or another, I’ll be met with joy and respect.

Stranger things have happened.

What I’m Reading

I picked up (and devoured) The Kaiju Preservation Society and Starter Villain by John Scalzi. Both were really funny, fast reads and I loved them. The cats!

I dipped my toe into sci-fi romance with Trial and Temptation by Ruby Lionsdrake. I enjoy her Lindsay Buroker books, and this was a fun romp with a hero who is very clearly coded as neurodivergent (probably on the autism spectrum).

I had high hopes for Playing the Witch Card by KJ Dell'Antonia, a cozy paranormal romance with a midlife heroine and a baking and tarot-based magic system. It should have ticked all the boxes for me. But I found myself more interested in the relationships between the heroine, her mom and her daughter than the shallow and underdeveloped romance. Bummer.

Wreck the Halls by Tessa Bailey was an unmitigated win. The children of two feuding female rock icons have to work together to try and reunite them for a Christmas special. They each have their own reasons for agreeing to be part of a completely insane livestreamed reality show about their efforts. It is absolutely crazyballs hilarious, steamy, and fantastic.

Station Eternity by Mur Lafferty was a murder mystery in space that took the idea of a person who is coincidentally always around when people drop dead and always able to uncover the killer to some wild and amazing places. Hilarious and sad, with a solid twisty mystery - I loved this one.

Dungeon Mom

Some forward momentum! The Spousal Unit and I dropped in on a store game of D&D, and had maybe our best Date Night in years (it also involved an Applebee’s playing “Best of Both Worlds” from Hannah Montana and “Leave It All to Me” from iCarly as part of the ambience mix). Naturally, that game immediately got canceled. But we’re on a waiting list at a different game shop. And Spousal Unit ran a one-shot for me and my Indiana Besties when they flew out for a visit.

So… dice have been rolled. I played a druid that wild-shaped into a snake, and got fed through an arrow slot so she could transform back into a 7’ tall half orc and smash two goblin’s heads together. Also got to play a trickery domain cleric who immediately betrayed her party after successfully infiltrating a dragon lair, because trickery domain. Good times!

In the Works

I also started writing a serial fiction on Royal Road, and made some good progress until school started. Since then, I’ve had a hard time getting back into that story. Mainly because between work and school, I don’t really have that much excess storytelling and writing energy to spare right now.

I’d like to pick it back up, but I need to make sure I can keep all my current plates spinning first.